First Announcement: HTOZ4 (Hypno-Talkers Of Zlar, Book 4)

I haven’t come up with a title yet. No cover picture is in the works. The only things I can say for certain:

• This story will wind up the “Hypno-Talkers Of Zlar” series. So at the same time that the HTOZ4 ebook comes out, we’ll also start selling a paperback and an ebook for the entire “Hypno-Talkers Of Zlar” compendium/omnibus/collection.

• Egbert the nerd will get laid in fine style in HTOZ4.

• A character in HTOZ4 (the main character?) will be a spy, likely for the Central Intelligence Agency.

• Lourdes Taylor wants to solve the Zlarians’ sick-female medical problem, so that the aliens will leave Earth voluntarily. The U.S. Army wants to drive the Zlarians away from Earth by force. The Zlarians have no hope of anyone finding a cure for their sick-female problem, and the Zlarians aren’t about to leave Earth without such a cure; and the Zlarians aren’t worried about the U.S. Army even a teeny bit. Meanwhile, Australia wants Sheila back.

More details as they become available.

EDIT: Added 2014.08.14—
Buy Nerd Saves Women (Hypno-Talkers Of Zlar-4) now! You know you want to.

Chapters 1 and 2—FREE!

Or buy the whole shebang, The Hypno-Talkers Of Zlar Four-In-One. Just one dollar more! (For ebook.)



Sturkwurk, Who Illustrated All But One Of My Covers, Has A Tumblr Page

Before I tell you about that, let me give you a little historical background.

I was at DragonCon in Atlanta sometime in the 1980s, the year that fantasy cover artist Boris Vallejo was a Guest Of Honor. DragonCon had a little art gallery, and there I saw something that I’ve never forgotten.

It was an oil painting by Boris Vallejo. Undoubtedly it was originally painted to illustrate a seven-inch-tall paperback book, but I was seeing the original (two-feet-tall) painting.

Here’s what the painting showed—

A barbarian man and a barbarian babe were confronting a very large and very unfriendly fire-breathing dragon, who was only a few feet away.

The man and woman were each heavily muscled, were each almost naked, were each holding a ridiculously impractical spear, and each had his/her back to the viewer.

Boris Vallejo had mentioned at DragonCon that he hired models, so it was no surprise that the humans’ muscles looked right, and the lighting and shadows on their bodies looked right. The result was that the humans looked believable (except for those spears!)

But the reason I remember the painting so well is not because of the people, but because of the dragon. The dragon looked like a real animal with sharp teeth, scales, and muscles under the scales. The dragon’s mouth was open slightly, and just in front of that mouth was gray smoke, which was internally lit by glowing orange flame. The orange-glowing smoke acted as a second light source on the dragon’s body. What a problem for an artist to visualize! And yet the dragon, too, seemed utterly real.

I stared at that painting, from just a foot away, for ten minutes, and I couldn’t spot one thing “wrong” about that painting.

Which filled me with despair. I was a good sketch-artist, and in my teens I’d gotten good with drawing with pastels, but I couldn’t make a picture of an image that I was imagining. Looking at that Boris Vallejo painting, I yearned and craved to do what Boris Vallejo did for a living, but I was crushed by reality: I simply could not make a picture of what was not there, no matter how vividly I imagined it.

Flash-forward to 1995. I took no notice of it at the time, but a software program named Poser came out. Poser was designed to show imagined human figures. Poser 1 was very primitive, however: The human figures were bald, naked, and their skin was the uniform color of a clothing-store mannequin.

Flash-forward to 1997. Poser had advanced enough that people could create simple artwork with it, and some artists were starting to do just that. None of these early Poser artists’ artistry could come close to Boris Vallejo’s, but

Beginning in 1997, Boris Vallejo no longer had a monopoly on illustrating the imaginary.

Doug Sturk, Jr. started working with Poser in 1997, and he’s been rendering imaginary images with Poser software ever since.

Now he has a Tumblr page to show you his current artwork. And some of his pictures give me the same “it isn’t real, it can’t be real, but it looks real” eerie feeling that the Boris Vallejo painting did.

But there are some pictures that Sturkwurk rendered but he may not show, because he doesn’t own the copyrights to those pictures anymore. So since he isn’t allowed to show those pictures, I will.

vvv Cover art shown with permission of Hypo To Helio Books.

DOCTOR MC, MAD SCIENTIST author picture, 540x593

^^^ Here am I, Doctor MC, acting all mad scientist-y.

NAMES HAVE POWER cover illustration

^^^ Here’s the illustration that goes at the top of the front cover for my novel Names Have Power: Tim’s Magic Voice Makes A Harem.

BIMBORG front cover, redo, 450x675, CF1

^^^ The front cover for my novel The Bimborg: Part Nanobot, All Woman.

Captive of the Barbarian King front cover

^^^ The front cover for my short story Captive Of The Barbarian King. I think Sturkwurk did a better romance-novel cover than most romance-novel artists do.

Hypno Talker front cover

^^^ The front cover of my short story The Hypno-Talker Of Zlar (HTOZ1). This picture is definitely a case of “not real but looks real” in the best Boris Vallejo tradition.

Hypno-Talker2 front cover

^^^ The front cover of my short story Hypno-Talker’s First Download (HTOZ2).


^^^ The front cover of my short story Revenge At College (HTOZ3).

The only one of my novels and stories that Sturkwurk hasn’t created the cover for is Three More Wishes: Be Kind To Your Genie.

For more information about these novels and stories, and for links to free sample chapters, go here.

Steve Jobs Recommends Six Out Of My Seven Stories

Okay, okay, I exaggerate slightly, being as Steve Jobs is dead!

But right now, all but one of my novels and stories are for sale in Apple’s iBookstore. The one story not up:

Revenge At College—everything has been submitted by the publisher (Hypo To Helio Books), and hopefully Apple will have this story’s page up soon.

Here are the live links to my novels and stories on iTunes:

Names Have Power: Tim’s Magic Voice Makes A Harem

Three More Wishes: Be Kind To Your Genie

The Bimborg: Part Nanobot, All Woman

Captive Of The Barbarian King

The Hypno-Talker Of Zlar

Hypno-Talker’s First Download

For more information about these novels and stories, and for links to free sample chapters, go here.

EDIT: Added 2014.01.10—

Revenge At College now is for sale on Apple.

For more information about Revenge At College, and for a link to free sample chapters, go here.



Cover art rendered by Doug Sturk a.k.a. Sturkwurk

This is the third story in the Hypno-Talkers Of Zlar series.

Jerry Green wasn’t socially skilled. He asked hottie Cindy, who was totally out of his league, for a date. He never checked whether she had a boyfriend, and the actual asking Cindy for the date was done ham-handed.

But Cindy didn’t tell Jerry No, I won’t go out with you, or even say to him What, are you kidding? Instead, Cindy set up Jerry to be played for a fool and publicly humiliated, during a Saturday-night sorority party.

Now Jerry wants revenge on Cindy and the other sorority girls who helped set up the cruel “prank.” Jerry has a potential tool for revenge: He recently discovered something on the Web called a “hypno-talker.”

Tags: alien invasion, aliens, conspiracy, erotica, female virgin, female-female, FF, hypnosis, lesbian, lesbian to bi, male dominant, male-female, MC, MD, MF, mind control, oral sex, sorority, straight to bi, vengeance

The story is 21,600 words.

PUBLISHER’S NOTE: All ebooks by this publisher are free of DRM (Digital Rights Meddling).

Buy Revenge At College (Hypno-Talkers Of Zlar-3) now! You know you want to.

First two chapters—FREE!
Apple iTunes Bookstore

EDIT: Added 2014.06.27—
Page Foundry/Inktera EPUB

EDIT: Added 2014.09.06—
Buy the whole shebang, The Hypno-Talkers Of Zlar Four-In-One.


REVENGE AT COLLEGE: First Two Chapters


Cover art rendered by Doug Sturk a.k.a. Sturkwurk

Chapter 0

Day 1
(Tuesday, April 2)
Fort Carver Post Hospital, Kansas

Army Captain Lourdes Taylor climbed out of the chocolate-chip Army truck that had backed up to the loading dock.

For this task, it was important that as few strangers as possible see what she was delivering, so entering the hospital through a regular door was out of the question.

Captain Taylor pounded on a loading-dock door. A second later, it was opened by a man in his forties. He was dressed as an Army doctor.

Captain Taylor saluted. “Doctor Renfield? I’m Captain Lourdes Taylor of Antares Company, Fourth SMB, making delivery in accordance with Plan Fifty-One.”

Major Frank Renfield, M.D. returned the salute. Then he put on an embarrassed smile and lowered his voice. “It’s been so long since I got the briefing, I’ve forgotten what Plan Fifty-One is in regards to.”

Then seeing her worried face, he added, “I remember that it’s rated Top Secret. All these medics with me have Top Secret clearances.”

Captain Taylor gave the doctor an impudent grin. “Then it’s time I remind you what Plan Fifty-One covers. You do have twelve gurneys ready, correct?”

Seconds later, a medic and a gurney waited near the truck. Two Antares Company men brought a Zlarian corpse out of the truck, and plopped it onto the gurney with no more reverence than if it were a sack of flour.

“Holy shit,” Doctor Renfield said.

Now I get the joke,” the medic said. “It’s Plan Fifty-One. As in ‘Area Fifty-One.’ ”

“What’s Area Fifty-One?” Doctor Renfield asked.

While the alien corpses were being loaded onto gurneys, Captain Taylor said to Doctor Renfield, “They’re Zlarians, from Zlar. Z-L-A-R. I don’t know whether that’s a planet or a star. Anyway, now it’s your job to cut these guys open and figure out how their bodies work.”

Doctor Renfield sighed. “Yeah. Such a simple task I have.”


Day 4, 0815 hours
(Friday, April 5)
Office of Col. Louis Brooks, Battalion Commander

Captain Lourdes Taylor was standing at attention, as Col. Brooks slapped the paper that lay on his desk. The same paper that Captain Taylor had just handed him.

He said, “ ‘Effective immediately’? You really are resigning your commission, effective immediately?”

“Yes, sir. As soon as the Army can cut me loose.”

Why, for fuck’s sake?”

“Conduct unbecoming, sir. I am a disgrace to the uniform and these captain’s bars, so I should no longer be wearing either of them.”

Captain Taylor was staring at the point on the wall that was directly in front of her nose, so she didn’t see the colonel’s reaction. But he was silent for a while, before he spoke.

“Are you under investigation?”

“Not yet,” she replied. “But sooner or later, I would be.”

Lourdes Taylor had turned seventeen unlucky civilian women who’d been hypnotized by the Zlarians, into Lourdes’s own hypnotized lesbian harem. But then old Kevin MacDonald, a Vietnam-era ex-draftee, had counter-hypnotized those women. If Lourdes stayed in the Army, she would be arrested, and she would be given a court-martial. While talking things over with Kevin, Lourdes had realized that resigning was not only the tactically smart thing to do, it was the right thing to do.

He said, “I could order you to tell me what this is about.”

“Yes, you could. If you order me, I will tell you.”

He said, “I told Brenda a month ago, I hope I live long enough to see you make General. Dammit, your men respect you, you throw yourself at problems instead of avoiding them, you’re creative, you’re resourceful, and your sense of tactics is excellent.”

Captain Taylor said, “Yes, sir. At West Point I dreamed of one day being a general. But at West Point I also was taught the Honor Code, and I’ve gone against it now.”

Col. Brooks sighed. “Very well, I will accept your resignation, effective 1600 hours. For the rest of the day, you are to teach Lieutenant Henderson whatever he needs to know, in order to be Acting Company Commander.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“At ease, for fuck’s sake! Have you given any thought to what you’ll do next?”

“I have, sir,” Captain Taylor replied. “Even though I won’t be in the Army anymore, I’ve figured out a way to still support our men in uniform.”

She didn’t mention that her planned way to “support our troops” was to become a stripper and streetwalker. The idea for that had come to her while she’d been talking with Kevin MacDonald.

Which in turn was right after Lourdes had realized that men were at least as attractive as women were.


Day 11, 1:11 p.m.
(Friday, April 12)
Wheat City, Kansas

“Oh, I’m not doing homework right now,” the college student told Lourdes. “I’m watching the noontime news.”

He spun the laptop around so she could see the screen. “See? There’s a flying saucer over Topeka.”


Streetwalker Lourdes Taylor had been flirting with a college student, trying to drum up some business, when he’d mentioned that he was watching the “noontime news.”

This puzzled Lourdes, because the time was after one o’clock, so the noontime news should be long over.

Then Egbert showed Lourdes why the local affiliate was broadcasting news instead of a soap opera—

There was a Zlarian spaceship floating over Topeka!

Now Lourdes learned that the spaceship had been there long enough for the entire Fourth Special Missions Battalion to go racing off to Topeka. But as soon as the 4th SMB got to Topeka, the spaceship flew away.

At high speed.

Straight toward Wheat City and Fort Carver.

Five minutes later, a TV station in Topeka discovered that the spaceship was flying at cloud-height, even though for a human pilot this is the stupidest act imaginable. Because the spaceship flew at cloud-height, it showed up on Doppler weather radar.

Lourdes watched, spellbound, as a live weather map showed a traveling magenta segment moving south-southeast across eastern Kansas.

The magenta segment moved fast, about seven miles a minute, and it kept heading straight for Wheat City.

Ten miles from Wheat City, the traveling magenta segment disappeared off the weather map.

Had the spaceship crashed?

Would it reappear in a few seconds?

Had it turned invisible to radar?

For the first time Lourdes realized, really realized, that she was a female of childbearing age, and that she carried no hypno-talker-blocking earplugs in her purse.

Just a few minutes from now, Lourdes could be a hypnotized thrall walking naked into that spaceship.

Chapter 1
Jerry Asks Cindy For A Date

Friday, April 12, 1:26 p.m.
English Building, Kanssouri University
Wheat City, Kansas

The class had just ended, and Jerry Green was pulling on his Pizza King windbreaker. Jerry couldn’t remember anything about footnotes, today’s lecture topic. Instead, Jerry had been thinking all period about Cindy Hope.

This was the day that Jerry would ask sorority hottie Cindy for a date! Will she say yes? Will she say no?

Jerry figured that the worst that would happen was that maybe she’d laugh at him. That’s why he was going to ask her out when nobody was around, just in case.

Cindy stood up now and was gathering up her books. Look at her, 67 inches of big-breasted, blue-eyed lusciousness! “Cindy! Wait!” Jerry called out.

Cindy looked in Jerry’s direction and frowned slightly. “Yes?”

Jerry dumped his The Modern Term Paper textbook, his notebook, and his pen into his bookbag, put his bookbag on his back, and hurried over to Cindy.

By now the classroom was empty, and Cindy’s frown was bigger. She glanced at the clock on the wall.

Jerry had practiced in the shower what he was going to say to Cindy, and how he was going to say it. But when he was actually standing two feet in front of her, he blurted out—

“Cindy, I think you’re pretty and you dress nice and you act confident all the time and would you go out with me tomorrow night?”

Cindy pasted on a fake smile. “Listen, um … what is your name again?”

“Green. Jerry Green, and—”

“Jerry, I’m sorry but I already have plans for tomorrow night.”

“Not a problem, because I work tomorrow night. What about Monday or Tuesday?”

Cindy didn’t answer his question; instead, she asked a question of her own: “Is Pizza King where you work?”

“Yeah. Every weekend, Friday night and Saturday night and Sunday night, I’m delivering pizza.”

Cindy looked thoughtful for a moment, then asked, “Do you work around here? Do you deliver to Alpha Sigma Sigma sorority house?”

“Yeah, sometimes, though usually it’s the frat houses who order the pizza. Anyway, what do you say about going out with me on Monday or Tuesday?”

Cindy gave Jerry another fake smile. “Let me think about that, okay? But in the meantime, you’re definitely working tomorrow night? Delivering pizza?”

Jerry couldn’t guess what Cindy was thinking. “Yeah?”

Now Cindy gave Jerry a brilliant smile. “Tomorrow night, Alpha Sigma Sigma is throwing a lawn party, and we will need pizza. I will make sure we ask for you to deliver it, Jerry Green.”

So saying, Cindy gave Jerry a girly-wave, then she sashayed out of the empty classroom.

Jerry thought, That didn’t go as bad as I feared. True, I didn’t get the date, but at least she didn’t embarrass me.

Buy Revenge At College (Hypno-Talkers Of Zlar-3) now! You know you want to.

Apple iTunes Bookstore

EDIT: Added 2014.06.27—
Page Foundry/Inktera EPUB

EDIT: Added 2014.09.06—
Buy the whole shebang, The Hypno-Talkers Of Zlar Four-In-One.